I'm sick...

and tired. Oh and I'm also sick of being sick and tired. I took myself to the ER yesterday morning at 2:30. My throat hurt. Is that a good reason to go the the ER? Well it was good enough for me because it had progressively gotten worse. I couldn't sleep or hardly swallow my own saliva! You should hear the super sexy voice I have! The dr. gave me steroids to make the swelling go down, are they the same kind that give you big muscles? I was also given some antibiotics and pain medication. Then after 3 1/2 hours sent on my merry way home to, hopefully, get some MUCH needed sleep. Sleep came and then went. Not enough. I'm feeling a little better today. I have faith in my little Z-pack(antibiotics). I haven't even used the major pain drugs they prescribed me. I'm tough like that. I think I may muster up some strength, now I'm sure those weren't muscle building steroids, to go take a much needed shower. I should probably eat, it's now 11:00 am. I had 3 bowls of Life cereal yesterday. I may have 3 more today. It's the only thing that sounds good. I like the way it feels on my ailing throat.

Getting old...

When I got married all I wanted was to be older. EVERYONE told me I was "just so young." Which I really was, so I guess they were just telling me the truth. I shouldn't complain. Anyway, back then and even now I am not complaining about getting older. I still feel like I did when I was 20, even though I am now closer to 30, it's really no biggie. It just seems like I should enjoy the ride since it's gonna happen whether I like it or not. Well lately I have been noticing true signs of change in my body. It's really sort of starting to freak me out. Most of the things are so WEIRD I'm wondering if it's just me? Since I am not afraid of being embarrassed I'm going to list some of the things I am noticing:

~ZITS! What is up with the zits man! I am getting them in places I have never had them in my LIFE. i.e. back, neck, face, and even one in my armpit the other day! Oh and I have one growing inside my nose right now! WHY OH WHY??

~ Gray HAIR!! So far the gray hair tally is 6. They are no longer in my head, thank you. Although the time will come I probably shouldn't pull them out anymore!

~ Speaking of hair, I am getting little tiny hairs all over my NOSE! I seriously have to pluck the hairs that are all over the OUTSIDE of my nose!

~ Gas. Yep I have been having even MORE issues with my belching. Although I think this one really could be just me. But I had to list it just in case!

~ Eye bags. Even when I get a good nights sleep it seems like there is still a little shadow under my eyes.

~ Teeth. I just realized that a lot of old people have dentures! I have this one tooth that seems to be a little loose. But it could just be my imagination.

Even though I feel fine and young, all these things are starting to make me think otherwise. Please tell me if any of these things are way abnormal so I know to go see a doctor!

Life...

I remember when I was 18 and just married. I was the cute little wife that made a lunch for her hubby and kissed him off to work. I cleaned my little apartment and read books. I don't really remember what else I did. Then 2 months went by and I was feeling sort of sick. After peeing on a stick the night of hub's brother's open house, our future was inevitable. We were going to be parents not even a year after being married! We were so shocked, we both sat on our hand-me-down couch in our teeny apartment and stared at the wall. After that I was the cute growing 19 yr old pregnant wife. I would sometimes make a lunch and kiss my hubby off to work. I spent many precious moments hanging out in the bathroom vomiting. I think I watched Regis and Kelly so much that I thought I was truly friends with them! Then I started working at an elementary school as a teacher's aide while my belly grew and grew. After my darling daughter decided to be just about 2 weeks overdue, I had a little baby. My life changed in ways I never knew it could. That little girl is now 8 years old and she has a little sister 28 months younger than her. Those two children are my best friends, besides the hubs. I could not imagine my life without those girls! They are what make my life complete. After raising them to be old enough to go to school they are now on their own for 6 hours of the day. That terrifies me! My babies are away from me for most of the day.

Now I am the cute, hopefully shrinking belly, wife. I make lunches for my kids, and kiss them off to school. I ask hubs what he is doing for lunch, make sure he eats something. Then I kiss him off to work on the days he doesn't leave before I wake up. I stay home and I exercise, read, cook, clean, do mountains of laundry, watch a little too many GG that I really truly think I am friends with them.

My life is good.

Need a little Faith…

For our Primary Activity last month we had the kids plant some Rye grass in little pots. My friend who is the 1^st counselor had done a test run to see if the grass would grow. She did this over a month before our activity. Well nothing happened. I think she actually planted the seeds 3 times. When we did it at the activity we had no idea if the seeds would actually grow. My girls had faith that theirs would grow. The Primary president's husband has said he asked all the kids if anyone had grass growing. No one did, but WE DO! One is doing better than the other, but they are growing a ton! They love their grass!

A couple weeks ago hubs had to go out of town for work for most of the week. I hate it when he's gone, and I don't think I can function, let alone sleep. But this time I had faith that I would be fine and guess what I was! Well sort of. I ended up getting sick, BUT it was ok because the kids were so great at taking care of themselves and hubs was actually able to some home 6 hours earlier than he was originally scheduled.

Last week I decided that I need to quit my job. Now this was not an easy decision. I liked working, but I couldn't handle the bad way that I was treated by some of the other employees. (FYI: hubs works there and no it was not him who was treating me bad!) After I put in my notice I got a little freaked out when I thought about being home by myself while the kids are at school. After all, that was the WHOLE reason I got that job, so I wouldn't be alone! After the initial shock faded I decided that I would have faith that it will all work out and miraculously my fear subsided and was replaced by a peaceful feeling! I am actually now looking forward to being home and discovering myself and drenching myself in projects and being able to have more time to be with my family.

Today I realized that having faith is actually not easy. In the scriptures it reads: "And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you."- Matt. 17: 20

That last phrase that I put in bold is so profound to me! Imagine that if you just have enough faith that NOTHING shall be impossible to you! Grass will grow. Being home by yourself won't be horrible. Fear will disappear. You can move a mountain!

I think we all just need a little faith…